What is your favourite animal based on this selection?
Swordfish
Catfish
Rockfish

What is your favourite colour based on this selection? _{all of these internet quizzes have to have this question so bear with me here}

Green
Red
Blue

After answering the 'favourite animal' and 'favourite color' questions required to enter port, you disembark from your ship to spend a day in the mysteriously-named Crocodile Cove. What do you wear?

I'm going to wear my crocodile costume to fit in with the locals.
I dig out my t-shirt that says 'Spring Break: Sydney Cove 1789', that sounds good to wear.
I wear the same thing I wore yesterday, and the day before, and the day before...

You walk out into Crocodile Cove, which is exactly what you think it is. Crocodiles lay on the shore, wearing their crocodile sunglasses and reading Crocs Weekly. One of them takes off his sunglasses and asks if you're one of those tasty tourists...

No! Absolutely not! Look, I'm a crocodile too! See this totally-not-a-costume tail I have?
You know where there's some tasty tourists to eat? Nice. I'll bring the beans.
You're not listening to the crocodile, you're too busy running frantically around the beach chasing seagulls.

The crocodile is scrutinizing you suspiciously when you suddenly hear a voice croak, "Carl!" The crocodile groans and says, "that's my wife." Canned laughter plays out of nowhere. The other crocodile lumbers up to you; she has a pink bow on her head so you know she is female. "Who's this, Carl?" she asks. You introduce yourself as:

A mysterious stranger from afar who is in no way a threat to the local populace.
Hi! I'm (name)! Please don't eat me!
You don't introduce yourself. You instead stand there in silence thinking about swinging from the rigging in a pair of crocodile skin breeches.

The other crocodile snorts. "What brings you here to our fair Crocodile Cove, huh?" You answer:

A person like me doesn't need a reason to travel the high seas, m'croclady.
I was sent here against my will but was promised a lot of beans.
I'm on vacation and I just adore crocodiles...

"Liz, why don't you tell this uh, non-croc, about the big contest, yeah?" says Carl, rolling onto this side (but not death rolling, thankfully). "Oh yeah," says Liz. "You should go to the royal palace, it's the Sovereign's Birthday today and you can win prizes!" She wags her tail happily. What do you think about this suggestion?

Prizes you say? Are they... valuable?
I love a good contest! And I'm totally going to win! If I don't win though, I'll just scream and kick things over until I am given a prize.
Oh that sounds nice. I wanted to go to the chocolate shop but this is fine... don't eat me...

You bid Carl and Liz goodbye and make your way to the palace, which is just a sandbank with the word 'PALACE' crafted into the sand with... are those bones? The Sovereign is a massive crocodile with a bone crown. "Ah," says the crocodile, "finally, we have enough contestants. Before the festivities begin, I demand my gifts!" The Sovereign looks at you expectantly. Quickly compromising, you...

...begrudgingly take your emergency bean rations out from under your hat and offer them to the massive croc.
...dance a merry jig for the crocodile, hoping that's enough. You also fall on your face a few times.
...have no choice, so you reach around your neck and take off your locket with a photo of your beloved Bingus inside. You offer it to the crocodile.

The Sovereign is pleased with your gift, but that was a close one. The massive crocodile hops up and down, shaking the bones and sand around you. "Ooh, now it's my favorite part of the party! Karaoke!" You better indulge the croc. Which song do you choose to sing?

The Titanic theme with someone in the audience poorly playing the recorder.
You want to sing Rule, Britannia to please the Sovereign but you forget the words and end up mumbling about Christmas and beans instead.
inhales deeply WAYHAY AND UP SHE RISES, WAYHAY AND UP SHE RISES, WAYHAY AND UP SHE RISES ERR-LIE-IN-THA-MORNIIIIIINGGGGG

"That was lovely," says the Sovereign as they wipe a crocodile tear from the corner of their eye. "Your reward." You are gifted a large green toad and told to give it a good name. The name you choose is:

Taco Bell $5 Dollar Grilled Cheese Burrito Box
His Lordship Sir Hoppington I
One-eyed Bill Jack the Frog... I mean toad.

After bidding the Sovereign adieu, you walk away with your new toad. Unfortunately, you accidentally bump into someone -- another person! -- and knock their pie onto the ground. They are so disappointed! How do you handle the situation?

Pat your toad on the head and say 'OOPS' in the most annoying tone you can.
Eat the pie off of the ground while making animal noises so they'll leave you alone.
Cry.

On your way back to your ship, you see a crocodile merchant selling hats for toads. The hat you pick out for your toad is:

A tricorne hat with the biggest feather you can find.
I buy several hats, including a top hat and a fancy toad crown.
Cat ears.

Days have past. You were warned to not feed your toad after midnight, but you forget one night and give the toad a tasty Toad Treat(TM). Suddenly, the toad transforms... into the legendary dread pirate Captain Higglypiggly! What do you do?!

See if the pirate wants to negotiate with you. If he resists, you will reach into your coat (which is not coloured any particular colour) and throw your emergency attack lobster at him, which will promptly pinch the pirate captain into submission.
This guy is totally going to take my piggy bank and kick me in the shins! I better hide!
It's been so long, Cap'n! Do ye want the rest of these here Toad Treats(TM)? I'm gonna eat 'em if not... oh wait, I already ate 'em. Don't flog me, sir. Remember the hat I bought ye!